I told my wife I had bad news to tell her — bad news for her.
“I am in love with your best friend, and we have already had vicious, satisfying intercourse,” I said.
“But my best friend is a man,” she replied, confused, “Was our whole marriage a sham? How could he do this to me? How could you?”
I smiled, knowing I could be a small comfort to the woman I now found disgusting.
“You will be happy to know,” I said, “I thought Liz was your best friend, so I guess you weren’t betrayed as badly, huh? But yeah, our marriage was a sham.”